Earlier this morning I woke up thinking about a friend of mine. We’ve been friends for a very long time. I can count the days I’ve seen him completely sober on one hand [maybe two].
My buddy is on probation for drugs. Being on probation for drugs, he’s required to submit a Urine Sample 3-4 times per week. I’d be surprised if he’s turned in even one negative sample so far. Soon, if he doesn’t begin to show some measure of progress, a sanction will be handed out. Possible sanctions include spending three nights in jail. Not a lot of jail time unless you’re used to being home at night. Most of us are used to being home at night.
He recently messaged me for help. It seemed he wanted advice or some kind of assistance. Most of us know how this works, he has to put the work in and take care of business.
Not a day goes by I don’t worry about this friend of mine. I’ve been wishing him good health and praying for him for some time. The picture is not as grim as it appears. Up until a few months ago, he wasn’t on probation, nor required to achieve sobriety. With each passing day my friend continues to use, he comes one step closer to being sentenced to a six-month stay at a Residential Treatment Facility.
My friend of over twenty years is a good man [see below]. The kind of man who works hard, and doesn’t abuse or chest in his wife. Unfortunately, the sum of his good qualities didn’t cover the cost of his addiction. His around the clock use of narcotics, together with a long list of poor decision making, stripped away most of the things he treasured, including his wife. Of course, this is how it works for both the addict, and the loved ones who hold on longer than they can. Drugs bring lies and secret lives. Few evils will destroy a relationship faster than the absence of the truth, and even those evils will most certainly carry some measure of lies and deceit.
Now . . . I’ve labeled my friend a [Good Man]. I’m able to make the distinction: He’s a good man, although a man battling with drug addiction. The brain of the addict lies constantly. I often compare it to a parasite, desperately holding on by any means necessary, refusing to loosen the grip for fear of its own demise. With his wife’s hand clasped within his own, my friend stepped before witnesses and [Said The Words]. My friend and his wife said their Wedding Vows to each other.
Few relationships can survive the Absence of The Truth, and the secret life required for drug dependency.