Last night, while attending a Zoom Meeting for Treatment & Recovery, someone asked me a question. We were discussing a situation I had last weekend involving an opportunity for me to relapse. Everyone who’s in recovery is constantly placed in situations of potential relapse, or in some cases, a minor lapse [as some call it]. This [situation], materialized during the end of a string of events, smaller situations that I’d placed myself in intentionally for the sole purpose of . . . For only one purpose: An opportunity to be tested, thereby passing the test, thereby showing The Universe that this time around, I’m serious, I’m armed, and I came to play.
She asked me, “what kept you from relapsing?”
Immediately, I began verbally listing those things dear to me that I would lose if I chose a life of drugs over my life of sobriety and sanity. Within moments I checked myself and my answer. Here’s the appropriate response.
“I have no desire to use drugs or numb myself.”
It’s official, I’ve healed from the pain of my second divorce and the lies/betrayal that accompanied the broken union of one. I struggled greatly, accepting the fact that I’d lived in a world of self-deception for over ten years.
For those of you in recovery, or considering recovery, there is an abundance of online resources at this time. The COVID-19 Pandemic cannot, and will not stop us from recovering.
April 18, 2020